2010,  Maternity,  random

Am I crazy?!

I miss my pregnant belly.  I missed it as soon as I didn’t have it. Don’t get me wrong, I love having E on the outside and being able to hold him but I miss that ginormous moving belly that I had. I miss the glow that has now been replaced with exhaustion some days.  I never was uncomfortable or wishing I was no longer pregnant so I think that has something to do with it. People, especially other women who are pregnant or have been, think I’m crazy! Maybe I am. Never said I wasn’t.

What may make me even more “crazy” is I love my post-partum body. Well maybe not love, but I definitely am not bothered by it in the least. I don’t find myself turning away in the mirror. I didn’t scream when I saw I got 4 stretch marks AFTER I was done being pregnant. I didn’t cry when I saw how my belly looked when I got home from the hospital (btw it’s now a lot like my ‘old’ belly…the size is the same but it’s a different consistency if you know what I mean! lol). I did freak out when I saw a picture of me from behind and I thought I had “Mom Butt.”  But then the next picture, there was no Mom Butt. It was just the angle of the picture.

I find every new mark and scar as a reminder of the beautiful belly I had. The epic birth experience I got to have. The beautiful baby boy that is now asleep on my chest. It’s not something I wish away or want to change. It’s there and there is nothing I can do about it and honestly I don’t mind it. My body did what it was supposed to, when it was supposed to do it (well maybe a few weeks early, but who’s counting?!) and the shape of motherhood is different for everyone.

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