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It Spins My Head Right Round
My head is spinning. So much information. So much emotion. I don’t even think I can put it all out there tonight. I don’t want to. I’m retreating inwards and trying to figure it all out on my own. I’m trying to understand. Everything is constantly swirling and it’s disjointed. I need to research. I need to reach out to others who have been here; to others who have worked cases like Noah’s. I’m lost. Completely out of my own realm of experience. I need guidance. Someone give me guidance. And peace.
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If you could change one thing about your life right now…
…what would it be? Good question. I have a ton of answers if I really think about. But at the same time, do I really want those things to change. I could wish about changing our finances. Where I’m living. My extreme shyness, which I’m told is probably not shyness at all but a social anxiety disorder. Health for family members. My weight. How disconnected I am from friends. The fact that I’m a picky eater. But honestly, first thought goes to changing our youngest son’s diagnosis. I would take those years of therapies away for him in an instant. The hurdles he is going to (and will) overcome. The ignorance he’s going…
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Take a Moment & Be Truly Thankful
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Respite & Recharged
Today we took E to a science/discovery centre. We’ve wanted to go many times when we’ve been up here but we’ve never been able to fit it into our schedule. When the sign went up at the RMH that they had a family pass, we couldn’t turn it down. Eli deserved to do something new and fun since he has been such a trooper through all the days visiting N in the hospital. He’s been so great with the many Dr. appointments and trips to Calgary so it was only fitting to spend a Saturday afternoon with just the 3 of us doing something fun without worrying constantly about the…
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More pieces
As I mentioned the other day, we got more pieces to Noah. Those pieces are kind of scaring me. All is fine and great with him now and hopefully will stay that way. They are just really concerned about what will happen if he needs to be put on a ventilator, has another episode like in July, or when he gets sick. Our hospital doesn’t have enough experience with something like this to keep our little guy safe. To hear all the specialists telling us that if he has an episode (i.e. caused by a bout of sickness) before they figure this out he has a high possibility of dying…