• 2015,  family,  JAA,  Pics,  reflection,  Relationships

    9 years

    *Be forewarned, potential to be mushy* 9 years married¬†today. 12 years together, 7 cars/Jeeps/vans, 3 apartments, 2 degrees, 3 provinces, 1 house (hopefully 2 sooner than later),¬†1 dog, and 3.5 kids (he he)¬†later I wouldn’t have wanted anyone else by my side¬†learning how to navigate this crazy thing called life that we have. My rock, my love, my best friend, my source of endless frustration and laughter. I knew that 9 years ago today I was making the choice I was meant to make and walked down that aisle without any fear or reservation.¬†We’ve had highs higher than highs and lows lower than lows and it’s not the end of…

  • 2015,  reflection

    Drafts, drafts, so many drafts

    If you could only see my draft list for posts. I’ve started so many posts about you. I started a Mothers’ Day post that I couldn’t finish. I couldn’t pull the words together and it just wasn’t done. I couldn’t get it to a place I was happy in sharing it. Maybe next year. I have posts before that and after and they are never enough. Never good enough. There’s so much to say but nothing that seems enough at the same time. Let’s just say I’ve really been missing you even more since finding out about this baby, especially more the¬†week when we finally announced our last baby will…

  • 2015,  BabyA2012,  Pics,  reflection

    Motherhood

    3 years ago I took this photo. It turned out to be my most favourite photo I’ve ever taken. It’s a day I’ll never forget.¬†I was past my original due date and I was still in the hospital hoping and praying I’d be home sooner than later. I was done with this surprise. I was done being separated from my family. I was done pumping behind a curtain. I was done having nurses, Doctors, residents, therapists, social workers coming through the door interrupting a nap/a phone call/lunch/cuddle time/a rare quiet “me” moment. I was done. All I wanted was to cuddle my newest son and be left the frick alone.…

  • 2015,  BabyA2012,  reflection

    Forever Changed

    Today used to be a day of anticipation because I love birthday cake and well, tomorrow is my birthday. But 3 years ago these days changed forever for me and I’ll never forget. It was beautiful and sunny and warm, much like it is today. We opted to have a family dinner with Elijah and afterwards John would change the tires on the car. We never missed a feed for Noah during the day. NEVER. One of us was always there, except for the 3am feed. We took that one off in hopes of getting some rest. Well wouldn’t you know, just as John has the tires half way changed…

  • 2014,  reflection

    My Mom

    My world stopped when I got the call from my broken-hearted brother that I should get home as soon as I possibly could. It was the call I was dreading for days, but somehow suspected was coming. I got a flight that night (thanks to the most amazing WestJet employee who, after 1.5 hours, managed to find me a way out of Calgary) and got to my Mom’s side as quick as I could. I held her hand. I introduced her to Oliver and he held her fingers. And I talked, or rather mumbled and blubbered, and sat in silence with my brothers waiting on a miracle that never came.…

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